Today would have been your first day of school. We would have taken a picture of you on your way out of the door in your new uniform with your new backpack. We would have walked hand-in-hand to your new classroom to meet your new teacher and your new classmates. We would have found your desk and the perfect place for your belongings. You would have quickly dismissed me with a kiss so you could play with the other kids. And I would have cried and rejoiced all the way to the car. I would overwhelm you with questions on the way home, parked in the parking lot way too early to think of them. And we would have had the first day of school banana split.
But today you're not here. You're far away.
You started school last week in a community school.
I bought other kids' uniforms. I drove other children to their first day of school. And took first day of school pictures with kids who didn't have moms to do it for them.
But I wanted it to be you. I want you to be here. For this family to feel whole. For these promises to feel completed. For it to not be another year of waiting - and almost, almoooost being too afraid to hope.
Today I want you to be here.
Today I wish it was that day when all things broken become whole, when every tear is wiped from every eye. I wish today was the day when waiting was finished - waiting for birth certificates, waiting for justice, waiting for hugs and kisses.
Today I cannot talk to you or take you to school, and today I cannot see your or hold you tight. But today I will pray. Our times together might be few and far between this year, but I believe we can feel Him and feel each other closer and deeper than ever before. I believe He won't let us go.
Today and all year, I'll parent you through prayer.
I'll keep telling the story I've told over and over again today: the story when God made us family.
The One whose Yes is Yes. I'll keep being the Amen.
Justice came through His Son. Justice came for mine. Justice is coming today.
"He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun." Psalm 37:6
The God who made that noonday sun stand still until His people were victorious is going to do it again. And He's going to do it better, more wholly, and more holy than I can imagine- or can even fit in my heart. Your dad's in that plan. Your future's in that plan. My heart and my hope are in that plan. And our Father says its good. He wrote Family, and He IS Family. He is all the way good today.
So this year, as long as that noonday sun stands high, as long as we wait, I'll pray. And I'll believe. And I'll pray when I don't believe.
Today I groan.
But today the Spirit intercedes for both of us.
And He reaches and He heals.
Today you are my family.
And today you are perfectly loved by Your Father and dearly loved by me.
Family-Maker,
Reach your heaven-filled hands down and touch us today. Touch us in a way where we feel you and know you. And where we feel each other. Where we can feel for just a moment what Family all-put-together feels like. Let Your Kingdom Come. Let that day come when the noonday sun sets and where Your Radiance lights our home. And let it give us enough hope to make it through today and tomorrow.
Please, Abba, please, let this year be a year of growth, love and Your Presence for Lifa and his dad. Let all the love you have for both of them be completed in them. Let this year set a glory-stage for your hopes for both of their futures. Let this year set a glory-stage for even greater things. Let this year be the year for his birth certificate. Let this year be the last year in a community school. Let this year put everything in place for a solid education. Release justice today.
And tuck Lifa in tonight knowing how much I love him. Fill his dreams with memories, stories and delight. Whisper love-Truths in His ears and tell Him the things You have for him. Tuck us in in You tonight.
Amen.
But today you're not here. You're far away.
You started school last week in a community school.
I bought other kids' uniforms. I drove other children to their first day of school. And took first day of school pictures with kids who didn't have moms to do it for them.
But I wanted it to be you. I want you to be here. For this family to feel whole. For these promises to feel completed. For it to not be another year of waiting - and almost, almoooost being too afraid to hope.
Today I want you to be here.
Today I wish it was that day when all things broken become whole, when every tear is wiped from every eye. I wish today was the day when waiting was finished - waiting for birth certificates, waiting for justice, waiting for hugs and kisses.
Today I cannot talk to you or take you to school, and today I cannot see your or hold you tight. But today I will pray. Our times together might be few and far between this year, but I believe we can feel Him and feel each other closer and deeper than ever before. I believe He won't let us go.
Today and all year, I'll parent you through prayer.
I'll keep telling the story I've told over and over again today: the story when God made us family.
The One whose Yes is Yes. I'll keep being the Amen.
Justice came through His Son. Justice came for mine. Justice is coming today.
"He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun." Psalm 37:6
The God who made that noonday sun stand still until His people were victorious is going to do it again. And He's going to do it better, more wholly, and more holy than I can imagine- or can even fit in my heart. Your dad's in that plan. Your future's in that plan. My heart and my hope are in that plan. And our Father says its good. He wrote Family, and He IS Family. He is all the way good today.
So this year, as long as that noonday sun stands high, as long as we wait, I'll pray. And I'll believe. And I'll pray when I don't believe.
Today I groan.
But today the Spirit intercedes for both of us.
And He reaches and He heals.
Today you are my family.
And today you are perfectly loved by Your Father and dearly loved by me.
Family-Maker,
Reach your heaven-filled hands down and touch us today. Touch us in a way where we feel you and know you. And where we feel each other. Where we can feel for just a moment what Family all-put-together feels like. Let Your Kingdom Come. Let that day come when the noonday sun sets and where Your Radiance lights our home. And let it give us enough hope to make it through today and tomorrow.
Please, Abba, please, let this year be a year of growth, love and Your Presence for Lifa and his dad. Let all the love you have for both of them be completed in them. Let this year set a glory-stage for your hopes for both of their futures. Let this year set a glory-stage for even greater things. Let this year be the year for his birth certificate. Let this year be the last year in a community school. Let this year put everything in place for a solid education. Release justice today.
And tuck Lifa in tonight knowing how much I love him. Fill his dreams with memories, stories and delight. Whisper love-Truths in His ears and tell Him the things You have for him. Tuck us in in You tonight.
Amen.
